Let's go have fun again

I wept in church yesterday. The good kind of refreshing tears I crave, but rarely cry. I know angry tears. I know grief tears. And I even stress tears. But refreshing tears, those are such a gift to our souls.

The pastor reminded us about the story of the son who went away from his dad’s house and after he ruined everything he decided to come back home.

Before he could get through his whole apology, his dad was already calling in the best party-planners. Let’s dance! Let’s celebrate! My son is home!

And then my blush started to run and so did my mascara.

Because coming home feels refreshing. It feels like a deep breath. A deep breath after working and striving and trying to measure up and being good at it all (and truthfully feeling like a failure) but showing up anyway and just plain old worn out at all the pain of life. Add on a pandemic, motherhood, the stretching marriage calls us to and friendships that have survived the weight of the past two years.

One.

Deep.

Breath.

Pause. Inhale. Exhale.

I felt God whisper, “Let’s go have fun again. Together. You and me. I’m not just before you. I’m not just behind you. I am with you.”

“Here’s your party dress. Here’s your sparkles. Let’s go.”

Ok, God. Let’s go.

Because the best news, happiest news, greatest news ever is that I don’t need a thing but Him. That when I feel myself striving, I can slow down and imagine my party dress and His hug. And I can breathe deep.

Because that’s the truth about you if you know God. It’s your best party dress, warmest embrace, strongest powers, never-ending grace for you, right now.

That’s happy. That’s the deepest kind of happy. And I’m sure glad God likes a good celebration. 

(Wink!)