Leave The Door Open

I went through a season when it was all falling apart. Every last bit of every last thread was unravelling. It was pain and sadness and I only wanted to run away. My Southwest history looked like a well paved pathway. Although I never purchased a run-away ticket, I thought about it almost every day just to get away from the pain.

During that season, a friend entered my life that leaned in and loved me. To be terribly honest, I am not even sure where we met. She started inviting me over to her home. We would sit in her sitting room with sun pouring in over our faces. 

If a room felt like a hug, it was this room. 

She would listen and ask me good questions.

Questions like;

“What am I learning right now?”

Or, “What am I sad about?”

She didn’t interrupt me when I would say I wanted to run away. Nor did she shame me. She’d nod and listen. And despite all my pain, I don’t think there was a time that I left that space that she would also ask me,

“What is bringing me the most joy right now?”

Because even in my pain, she wanted me to look for the light.

I started going to see my friend about once a month. She would leave the door open for me. She bought me creamer for my coffee even though she drank her coffee black. She never attempted to fix my story and she never attempted to fix me. Instead, she taught me about how much God loves me and how He delights over me. She even let me sit with a tissue box exploring the God of the Universe as my friend, not just as the Almighty. He is both and I can honor the tension.

Libbie, and her open door and her coffee creamer and good questions changed my life. When I look back on that season full of tangles and sadnesses, Libbie is a woman who helped me keep my eyes on what matter – I am loved. 

All it took was an open door and coffee creamer and some time. One whole world changed on that couch, living in a room with light on our faces.